She was wearing a dark rose colour dress; panic struck in her face; moving clueless; “appaa appaa” her voice stammered & helplessly shouting “appa, akkaa is trying to run away with him from the temple, she is not listening me, I could not stop her, do something pa! do something!”
The scene we saw as we waited for two more of our friends to get in our vehicle during our get together trip last week. The people in our group tossed random comments. One said that the pair was a mismatch; another suggesting what the people gathering around should have done. It’s a mokka plan baas” one among us expressed his disappointment, how the plan was imperfect.
Imperfect plan?
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My friends gathered in our shared accommodation were planning that so called perfect plan. Just couple more exams left in our UG final semester. Few of my friends were disappointed that I was quiet & not giving any inputs to them. The plan for 7 days seems okay for me, but what after that; Friends reminded me that I am rude & not sensitive to others feeling as I asked some questions on their plan.
Friends gathered at a temple, which was outside the city – the boy arrived – the girl arrived – the priest tried to explain that this marriage would be helping them legally – my friend made some flimy dialogues – marriage over – they been transported to a hamlet, which none could guess. The perfect plan was executed.
With the political influence that the girl side had and little sentiment drama by the girl’s mom, the police traced them down within 3 days. The police kept us busy during those days. The planners consoled them they did their best for that friend & certified themselves as ideal friends.
“Friends, you call yourself to him; why don’t at least one of you think of his meek parents” his mom asked us in broken voice. Everyone blamed the one, who insists to go & meet him at his home post his home return. His parents even then didn’t raise their voice against their only child. We had our farewell party same evening. Once it started, we almost start forgetting him.
Less than 3 months later, I received call that the guy died in an accident (??), a lorry ran over him.
All this I was thinking as noise – pulling each other’s legs – fun going around as our vehicle was speeding.
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I should call it’s just a mere coincidence as the friend who informed me about the death is the same friend I called few days before to check on some details and rent of vehicle, as he was running an travels earlier. After the initial conversation, he tried to do my mom´s job “marketing Marriage”. He explained how his life took a turn around when he married at the age of 22, etc... etc.. etc… But, what he categorically avoid telling me was the fact he was forced to married his 4th girl friend, when she got pregnant.
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Posting a blog on Feb 14th & with such title, am I suppose to start it with a greeting “happy valentine’s day” to any of the above three kind of love pairs? Would Father Valentine have helped these pair, if he was alive during this era? My understanding about Father Valentine is all he helped the roman soldiers to get married during the reigns of King Gladius II, who banned marriage of his solider, as he believed that it would make them to lose interest in war.
A nice line which I read here written by NEEYUM NAANUM admin earlier this month, made me think & reflect a lot.
(Love! But, before you understand about your lover; understand love!)
I really wonder if we, the modern day (or the post modern day as some would call) lovers understands love in the right sense. Somehow we let the meaning of this action verb “LOVE” dilute; Love, the single action bundle with many values. We let most of the values for cheap purpose.
Most people may not agree, if we say love should have a purpose. But my POV is both the lovers together shall determine where they want to take their love; which should obviously marriage; a detailed SWOT of their love; all way to try & make achieve the purpose.
Commercialized Lover’s day is not posing a big threat, what all we going to lose is, buying a greetings or gift worth Rs. 30 for Rs. 150 – eating in a restaurant which slams you with X% extra taxes, without considering which income group we are in. But these are fine only if the lover’s are honest and their love is genuine.
Genuine love doesn’t need a PHYSICAL proof or PHYSICAL ACT of confirmation. Let we not make a gender debate that who makes the other victim or a discussion agenda what wrong when it’s consensual.
“It’s more important to win the war than conquering a battle.
Love is a battle; but life is a war.”
So it’s okay if we fail conquering a battle (after honestly fighting it). But at the same time, we should be having minimum damage to us as we go ahead with the other battles of the war. Guilt would definitely hurt us big; people these days regret for failing to arm them to avoid this hurt.
After saying all this, I won’t allow you blame our generation on the whole. We are known for our trial & errors; the very concept which gave lot success in other verticals of life. We are just exposed to new and adverse conditions unlike most our predecessor. Its only we know how much guilt, hurt & tears we got in this battle, which we are hiding each day as we keep fighting other battles of the war called life.
We are skeptical, if what we see & observe, learn & read of any worth. After all, even the bestselling authors of my nation, in each of their novels narrates that it’s okay for to be in bed with an opposite gender before marriage. It had even evolved to an extent that it doesn’t matter if it’s more than one person.
As we speak of revolution in education, corporate, politics, etc. We need a revolution in our personal being, which includes our ideology about the love.
- This revolution may not make our parent’s option count but being honest to them.
- This revolution should make us discipline & behave with dignity in public places.
- This revolution should teach us patience against all irresistible, premature & pre-marital acts.
- Even if this revolution leads us to saying a blind NO to love prior marriage, as a matter of playing it safe.
I could able to hear some of you saying “It’s written by some one side lover in envy or some gut-less & old fashioned lover unlike the modern day lover”
Take your time & think serious about this REVOLUTION LOVE now; failing which will make FEB 14TH MORE VULNERABLE OF BEING 1ST OF APRIL BEFORE APRIL.
~stranger J
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